The first World cup 2019 is already in the books. To be honest, the preparation for this important race was everything else than easy. After my bad performance at the HC race in Heubach I questioned a lot and the self-concerns turned back. The rainy and cold weather at home didn’t made it easier. «Déjà vu» to last year thought.
The whole week before I have been really nervous. I tried to remember how calm and relaxed I have been before my first two Swiss Bike Cup races and how good I performed there. But it was hard to get it in my head. Hard after that defeat in Heubach. From the beginning of the week until race day on Sunday I have just been nervous the whole time. I guess that’s one reason why I would have preferred to quit the race during warming up. «I am not ready yet». «My legs are tired and heavy». «So many athletes are competing against you». «It’s World cup time Ramona, time to perform»! «You want to reach the qualifications for the Championships, right?». Stop it! «Ramona, really? Think positive! You trained well. You prepared yourself well and invested a lot of time and energy»! It was kind of like this devil & angel thing, where on every shoulder sits and tries to influence your thoughts. I fought mentally and the race haven’t even started. After finishing the warmup, I was shortly before crying. I was so scared to fail and I have been really unsecure that I preferred to hide myself in the bed than competing in the World Cup. Looking back now, I can’t understand myself thinking and feeling that way. «Das Übel, was uns trifft, ist selten so schlimm als das, welches wir befürchten» (Freidrich Schiller, Deutscher Dichter). In these moments it is might good to know that 98% of the concerns we have never becoming true. I decided to go to the start line and giving everything I could. Independent of what ranking I will reach, I have to reach or whatever…After a bad first lap I have been somewhere on position 45. Luckily this didn’t influence me and I slightly got my rhythm. Lap for lap I made some places forward. First top 25 and then I saw that the top 20 could be possible. In the last uphill I invested all power I had. I knew that if I can go first into the downhill, the other lady won’t overtake me till the finish line. And I did it. For me it’s a great result and I am happy with it. Now I am confident and looking forward to the next World Cup this Saturday in Nové Mesto (CZE).